Tattooed On My Brain Like a Misspelled Word

Conversation while watching Larry King last night. . . .

Larry King: And when we come back, John Rich, half of the duo Big & Rich talking about the song he wrote for the McCain campaign.

(Goes to commercial playing one line of the new song)

Me: Did you hear that? That one line of song ended in “train”. You know what they’re going to do. They’re going rhyme it with McCain.

Damonn: Oh god, really?

Me: Of course they are. It’s going to be something about getting on the train with McCain.

Damonn: Ugh.

Larry King: We’re back now with John Rich who wrote this song for the McCain campaign. Here’s a glimpse. . . .

(The song plays complete with video of him singing, a neon American flag, hot girls holding McCain signs, and a diamond studded microphone stand): “Get on the train or get out of the way, we’re all just raisin’ McCain.”

Me: Oh sweet Jesus, it’s worse than I thought. It includes a bad pun.

Damonn: Why would they use something so lame?

Me: Because every country song in the last ten years includes a bad pun and the rednecks eat it up. And when they step into the voter’s booth they won’t know the facts behind one single issue but they’ll remember this damn song.

Damonn: Ugh.

Me: This is what its come down to. This is how Obama will lose. To a half-rate song probably written in five minutes on a cocktail napkin. Not to a difference in policy. Not to rhetoric. Not even to negative ads filled with lies. He’ll lose to this damn song you can’t get out of your freakin’ head!